The Fall of Asterix Temple

There are weird books, and then there are WEIRD books.

The novel "The Fall of Asterix Temple" has no copyright and no known publisher. It's not listed in the Library of Congress. However, there are at least seventeen copies in circulation. The binding and printing, while a bit outdated and primitive, is definitely sturdy and totally free of any spelling or grammar errors.

The book is a 428 page, semi-autobiographical account of a man attempting to bring about an age where mages rule the roost and the mundanes cower in fear, but with many coincidental setbacks -- a sort of three-way fusion of The Turner Diaries, The Illuminatus Trilogy, and Big Trouble by Dave Barry. It appears to be set in the near future, but specific dates are never given.

The author/protagonist refers to himself as Dion Beckett, the last of a long bloodline of occult warriors following The Way of Cogs, known in the present day as Mechanomancy. Dion writes out his victories and defeats in his war to exalt the unnatural, as well as his more personal troubles along the way.

Main plot elements include:

-- A complicated plan to steal museum relics

-- An attempt to assassinate the Governer of Utah

-- A paranormal gang war, which describes in great detail the ongoing fight between the Fellowship of Bad Traffic and the Sternos in San Francisco, without naming names

-- A Mexican Standoff on top of the Hoover Dam

Lesser, recurring themes include:

-- A rash of disappearances and kidnappings

-- An rivalry with a Numerologist of considerable power

-- Traffic light systems failing on a regular basis, resulting in many traffic accidents

-- Dead robins

Personal elements related to the protagonist include:

-- Dion's addiction to Ovaltine

-- His irrational hate of flowers

The novel ends with the Baja peninsula sinking into the Pacific ocean, along with much of California's east coast. Numerous loose ends are left unresolved.

There is no author's name printed on the book. Anywhere