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Sure you've heard of 'em. Betcha didn't know you didn't need no genie or damn sure no fething leprechauns? Well if you be no fool then one secret is in life and death... as if it'd be anywhere else?
So you think your'e gonna save the cosmos do ya? Whats there thats worth saving? A man can't get a hot meal without spending something, or a roof over his head without killin someone else under it. Trust me even dead men need a place to hide from things. Dont ask me why, less you looking to join the dearly departed.
I'll make you a deal, you leave my motorpool swamp outta your goddamn war or rebellion cum slumber party you hear? Dont, ask me how I already know, I just do, believe me you don't wanna. Now I'm gonna tell you what you wanna hear, you wanna deal or not? Fine? Good, now listen and listen good cuz I don't like repeating myself. What I'm about to tell you is something no mere man may have or find. Something even God if he were still around would literally kill to have.
I remember this one man. A miner, he got lost in a cave in. He was alive but down in the dirt with no sun or food or nothing, it wasnt much. Tried to make the most of it with whatever he could find. Rats, scraps, whatever. He got so bored waiting down there, that he just dug and dug at the earth. Not like he had anything else to do, but wait and wait. Time slowly ticking by. He was getting faint, the air was running out, but that didn't bother him. Death was nothing, if not a release at this point. While digging he found a box. Small, hard and black like the heart of sin. He opened it and he found something, I dunno. Just that he knew between delirium and passing out he knew, that whatever was inside that box was his one ticket out of that hell hole. But he didn't wanna waste it, see he was a God loving man. So he thought that whatever he found musta been for a purpose, he musta been put there to find it for a reason. So he didn't wish for a way out, he wished to know how to make more.
Turns out he did, then he died. When they found his body, they were looking to bury him. But there was this moneycounter, pludofan or whatever you call'em nowadays. He found the box, empty of course. But the fella was smart, see he somehow knew, that the box didn't belong there. So he put two and one together, got curious and he just had to have that boy's body. So one night he burned a couple of major biggun's. He called up that boy's soul. He didn't have to look far, cuz it never left. Long story short, he got what he wanted and the whole kitten kaboodle. Thought he was gonna make a fortune, turns out it wasn't that simple. See there was a price to be paid, he knew that clear enough, but more than even he could have paid even if he wanted to.
But find a way he did, the story goes about differently, about how he managed to make some and by the end They got him. Who and how many? Heh, you look at how f*cked up the world is and make a guess. It don't matter, some say the sleepers, the clergy, even his own kind. See them money counters aint just looking to cash in anymore. They been doing it since the beginning, only now they paying for keeps cuz they got a huge debt to pay the powers that be, on account of that greedy, sonnovabitch. So they still paying and I reckon they'll be paying till doomsday and it still aint gonna be enough.
Moral of the whole lousy goddamn story is, between Life and Death anything is possible... anything. But the scales need to be balanced, only a life can pay for a life, and death covers death. And whats a dream come true if not a wish given life?
There's two parts so try to keep up...
Tools: For the first part you need a dying man or person. Not just anyone, but I'll get to that later. First you gotta find him.
You need a crystal from a repentant blind man, who murdered his own kin, dipped in his own blood.
You need a map drawn on the skin of a "reformed" epideromancer.
An ink bottle of red blood from a fat woman of very high stature, milked from her own breasts, of course. The higher the better.
A piece of leather twine, made from the innards of a young spring lamb violated thrice by virgin men on the summer solstice.
And a writing quill taken from a rooster’s tail feather that’s possessed by the soul of the dead.
Black tallow candles made from the fat of whores. Nine in all.
And salt made from the tears of angels. Told ya this stuff wasn’t easy… or cheap.
Sit in the middle of the circle of salt and candles, with your map before you take the flesh and write with the quill and blood ink to draw a map. How big and detailed your map depends on the amount of skin and your imagination… or your desperation. On a full moon, make the circle with the salt. If you don’t have enough, you cant go running to the store for more. So stock up. This is for your own protection. Place the candles around you in a circle at even intervals. This is best done outdoors with the full moon in the sky of course. You can have a major leyline under you, that might help.
Take the leather twine and tie the end to the crystal. At this point spend your one major mojo on the crystal and watch it spin on the map. It won’t stop until you make it stop or it finds a point on the map. This is to find a good man or woman who will die but are contented souls going to their final just reward. If you stop from exhaustion, or you cant maintain the spinning because the crystal hasn’t found one, yet, you’re gonna lose the charge and you’ll have to spend a new charge over again. You need to let the crystal spin as long a time to find someone as it can. The closer the person is to deaths door the easier and the quicker the crystal can find them. The farther away and well the same is true for the inverse.
The person, in question may not actually be dying, as said. The pointer ritual was just to find them and let you know who they were. Their dying was already preordained at the moment they came to be, so they must die as their time dictates. You cannot force the hand of Fate or really bad things will start to happen. How long you will have to wait, only time will tell. These things have a way of balancing themselves out, its their way. It will not be changed, it will only be followed. You will know the time, the place and the person and even the how. At this point assume the powers that be have it out for you real bad, they’re jealous about this sort of thing and never give up easy. A sign that this is was successful and the "authorities" are after you. Is after you’ve found you’re guy wind will scour your work and the crystal will hum and direct a beam of light to burn the map you’ve just made. The rest will be useless, except for the angel salt.
Ok easy parts over. So you found the sucker, avoided death and banishment from things and Them to get here, what now? You need to wait, just watch and wait and prepare. A problem with finding your man quickly is that you will find them faster but you’ll have less time to prepare(deaths door calling and shit), so its better to find someone, with ample time to prepare for them.
Why this kind of sucker? The thing about "good" "contented" people that makes them so special is that they have found what gave their life meaning and so are ready to move on to the next one, leaving this one behind. Lucky Bastards. They’ve got so much going for them, and they’ve made the most of it that they won’t see the fireworks when the whole shit hits the fan and everyone has to start over. That’s their privilege for getting it right early. You need to bag whatever they’re packing... that potential if you will. Still don't get it? Think about it... Everyone wants a wish, a last wish before they die. Its always been there even if you dont know how it got there, but these guys they never asked for nothing. An unfulfilled soul will ask for a lot of things, but it cant get them, cuz they've wasted their life "Wanting". The fulfilled soul wants for "nothing" and so are free to do "anything".
Ironically these guys are never from the underground, hm go figure I guess. Unfulfilled lives or one’s like ours always seeking something but don’t find it in our dozen or so lifetimes .Just too attached I guess to give away or find the secret of life.
You need to get a cigar made from a Native American woman, who once did Fidel Castro’s laundry. She’s the real reason for their success. Watch out for her, she's slippery and ornery.
A match taken from a special book of matches made by an extinct order of monks. (If they’ve been wiped already it means were really in for some deep shit on a truly biblical proportion).
Any container with cover, if detachable, that spent a year immersed in clear drinkable holy water on holy ground.
Once again you’ll need the salt. For protection, on this road very few things can hold up to some of what’s gunning for you. Godspeed.
When you find that person, you need to convince them. How, that’s up to you. I can’t tell you how, no one can. You need to convince them that on the day they die they have to give their life to you, "freely" and "willingly". They wont be giving up their soul, spirit whatever. You can’t have them, they’re already spoken for. What you need from them is the shadow of what they have, what they’ve been. The pure simple innocent enlightened potential that we all strive for that tells us the universe is ours because its not just in us. It is us. And these guys didn’t have to prove it, the knowledge of that potential is all they ever needed. They turned their backs on it, they just knew, they never needed it once they knew about it. They did what they came to life to do, great things and left it better than when they came into it. That’s gotta be one of the most powerful mojo I’ve ever seen. Sounds like the stuff that reality and the universe and even dreams are made of right? Or a really good trick, but this works too.
At their death bed you need to stay with the guy, no one else is supposed to be in there. If there are, they’re not friendly. Keep the circle intact and in between you, your friend and everyone else outside of it. How is up to you. That salt ain’t full proof you know.
You just need to offer them maybe their first but definitely their last smoke with the cigar and match. When you light it for them, spend your other major mojo. And just hear the tale of their life. When they take their first drag that cigar will last till their life story is over. You need to catch the ashes as it falls throughout the conversation with the blessed container. When they die, get the very last wisp of cigar smoke breath that passes from their lips. Cork it immediately.
Note: When and if a fight erupts the person wont notice as he smokes and talks his way through his life story. So are you a multi-tasker?
Payoff: The only way to find out if you got the real deal, is to open the container, inhale the smoke and ashes and "know". That's all there is. No spending of charges necessary. Anyone can open the container and make a wish. The only question you need to answer is, after all that trouble, is it gonna be you?
Rumors: You heard that part of the possible reason why such a ritual is so difficult and arduous a task is not because of the rarity of the material ingredients, but of the spiritual components. There’s this old rumor that if ever there are less than seven truly devout and good people. It will trigger the end of days. Well that’s what They were all about. “They” were supposed to be the guardians, they don’t like anyone messing around with anyone who qualifies to the “Seven” even though they can’t tell the difference anymore, who’s running the show, and it’s not even seven at all that’s just the bare minimum. All they know is that they can’t allow armageddon to occur and this ritual is seen in their eye’s as messing with the order. BIG TIME.
Asiatic | profile | Jun 26, 06 | 10:17 pm
Michael Keenan | profile | Dec 01, 07 | 4:19 am